Goalsetting is Like Hugging a Butt

Ok, let me explain. Lol.

I show a video highlight of the 1994 Olympics in Atlanta as an example of determination and emotion. One scene stood out and that was when a track runner won the gold and she jumped into the arms of someone in celebration. I don’t know the relationship between the two, but I noticed he hugged her whole body as they twisted and turned. He held her in mid-air. His arm supported her legs, hip, butt, and part of her back. I thought this was beautiful. It wasn’t a traditional hug where the couple is conscious of where their hands were. They hugged all of one another.

Working on your goals should be similar – make it so you’re making progress on your goals all the time. There’s no set time to work on goals. Embrace your goals, mission, actions, brainstorming all at once. It’s all connected. If your goal is a butt, your vision statement is your hips, and your legs are the purpose.

I’m a huge believer in micro-progress with goals. Create action goals requiring 15 minutes or less. And have plenty 3-5 minute goals. Keep chipping away at that goal. Keep the pressure on always.

I use the term “Make it liquid” to describe using the cracks of the day. Brainstorm your goals then see how you can cleverly tuck them in throughout the day. You only have so much time in the day. You say you want to read for an hour a day – how can you fit it in? Maybe you listen to audio books in the car during your commute. Listen to yourself reading your mini-mission statements, goals, and vision statement every day. Listen to a recording of your mini-mission statements while washing dishes.

If you’re hyping about New Year’s Eve resolutions, you’re missing the point. You should already have your habits and routines that keep the pressure on your goals. There’s nothing special about New Year’s Day. I don’t understand why people go gaga over it. I hate the crowds and all the hulabaloo.   

I use three types of goals: Action, Deadline, and Bucket List.

Examples:

Action Goal – Listen to the audio recording of my vision statement for 3 minutes daily

Deadline: By June 1, I’m scuba certified.

Bucket list: Ride in a presidential motorcade

Rocketman: Self-Development Lessons from the Film

Every time I watch Rocketman, the Elton John film, I appreciate it more. My favorite line of the movie is when Elton gets advice from another musician: “you have to kill your old self to create the new you.” It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes: It’s Never too late to be what you might have been” by George Eliot.

The first step in the All the Hats We Wear system is identifying all the hats you wear, of course! What some people don’t realize at first is that you can adopt roles you aren’t actually doing yet. Think of them as placeholder roles. For example, one of my roles is Philanthropist. However, I’m not rubbing elbows with billionaires at fancy galas but I can give of my time and effort. I can go after it each day to build my business and make my mark. One day I’ll be able to give like a true philanthropist. Other possible future roles or placeholder roles: visionary, business owner, entrepreneur, supervisor, CEO, professional speaker, or millionaire.

Another moment in the movie that inspired me was when Elton asked a friend how he could become a songwriter. The guy cleverly responded, “Write some songs.” Lol… sometimes it’s that simple! Just start doing it. The acting was excellent and I loved the way Elton was the focus of the AA meetings. The other members of the group were more like props. They didn’t act like normal people – they were much more subdued. It’s like in a play when everyone is talking in the background among themselves but inaudibly. The director turns the down the volume on the background players and brings the focus up for the leads. In many ways, we do the same thing in life. We transition between all of the hats we wear. Different roles require different attributes. Sometimes, it takes a conscious effort to ready myself from one role into another – especially going from work to home life. Music, deep breathing, and a minute of centering help to switch gears.   

More Journal than Blog

I’ve been thinking about my approach to creating content for my social media platforms. The cornerstone of my output should be my blog - which I’m thinking of as my business journal. I want it to be more journal than blog because I’m sick of doing cookie-cutter posts like the “3 Tips for Organizing Your Life” dreck. My new requirement is that I have that warm, centered feeling while writing it. In order to do that, I need chill music playing (preferably Pink Floyd) and I need a bold attitude of self-confidence without negative thoughts.

Perhaps I’ve been following too much advice from social media gurus. I wonder if I should write more for myself than my audience – even though it sounds backwards. Maybe if I dig deep and share for myself, it’ll be exponentially more beneficial for readers.

I’m considering my experience of following my own All the Hats We Wear philosophy as a social experiment. Therefore, all the posts will reveal my unique experience – like a mad scientist who takes his own concoction and observes the after-effects. I’lll chronicle a life lived through the ATHWW system. Maybe I’ll compile my entries to create a memoir in the future.

A few months ago, I completed the transcendental meditation training and I’ve been meditating regularly ever since. A key concept of TM is that it must be easy and effortless. I’m taking that same no-way-to-do-it-wrong approach to my blogging. If I sense self-doubt creeping up, I focus my attention on how it feels to start meditating. Boom! You just do it the easiest way possible and you’re good! It’s empowering to have an approach in which you can only do it correctly if it’s effortless!  

Podcast Ep 117 - The Cello Guru: A Conversation with Marcie Brown, Life Coach & Professional Cellist

Marcie Brown is a life coach and professional musician. She shares many of her insights on creativity and entrepreneurship.

Outline:
2:15 Get to know Marcie

6:50 Yuself Lateef

12:20 Cirque Du Soleil

15:00 The Cello Guru

24:00 Bes improvisation lesson ever

25:20 Benefits of playing an iinstrument

27:50 Goalsetting

28:00 Thinkific

31:40 Marketing advice

35:45 Authenticity

Links:
The Cello Guru: www.thecelloguru.com

Cello Nation Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/3731226183637662

Podcast Ep 116 - Transcendental Meditation: An Interview with Dale Friedgen, TM Instructor

Dale Friedgen, TM Instructor share a wealth of knowledge about Transcendental Meditation.


Podcast Outline:

3:17 What is TM?

9:15 Can you teach yourself TM?

11:48 The app for TM

16:26 Why isn’t TM training free?

19:52 The David Lynch Foundation

21:00 Celebrities that practice TM

23:00 The mantra and its use

25:00 What’s involved in the training course?

33:45 TM.org


Links:

Science of Being and Art of Living - book by Mararishi Mahesh Yogi

10,000 for World Peace Assembly

Mararishi International University

Mararishi Products

TM.ORG


Dale Friedgen, Director and Certified TM teacher

TM center

286 Boston Turnpike (route 9 east)

Shrewsbury, MA  01545

508-635-1569

dfriedgen@tm.org

http://www.tm.org/transcendental-meditation-central-massachusetts

Podcast Ep 115 - Knuck If You Buck

Learn how to title your roles so they inspire you. In episode 115, we’ll take a detailed look at my process for revising my role list. Also, we cover how to set up your day planner to capture all of your best ideas.

Outline:

1:00 Knuck If You Buck: The magic of music to hold you in a feeling you desire

3:38 Creating role titles

15:00 Tapping into enthusiasm

15:50 Transcendental meditation and simplicity

16:40 The Outdoor Boys

17:38 Breaking Bad tequila

19:28 Using All the Hats We Wear system during crises

20:45 John Bonham sounds like a carnival

21:30 Opinions on everything

22:36 Updated tabs in my day planner

I Finally Took the Transcendental Meditation Training

I've been wanting to take the transcendental meditation training for fifteen years. Daily meditations have yielded many benefits already - some surprising. You're supposed to meditate for 20 minutes twice per day. Each meditation is completely unique. I'm learning to do less in the meditation and expect nothing. Each time I come up with an analogy of the experience of TM, I realize it's easier than that. I'm reading faster and with more clarity. My eyes move quickly across words and I'm retaining more. The surprising benefit I received was feeling frustration and anger more in one instance - which you'd think would be the opposite of meditation. I had a very stressful, irritating experience yet found myself more alive and empowered - not passive like usual. And I liked that! Also, I had a particularly powerful meditation session in which I experienced what seemed to be a total white-out and my TM instructor told me that was experiencing pure consciousness - so I've got that going for me - which is nice, lol. TM has become an important ally: always there, without expectations, effortless, and always giving my mind and body what it needs. Overall, I’m enjoying the feeling of being more present and content.

Are You Thinking Big or Lying to Yourself?

My favorite viral video is where a Dad asks his young daughter to sit with him on camera while making a video to interview for a job. The Dad greatly exaggerates everything about himself and we see the daughter reacting to all the fibs. He says he gets up at 4am everyday, takes a 12-mile jog, and cleans the house etc… After a few minutes the kid can’t take it anymore and storms off. 

Sometimes you do have to exaggerate and fib to yourself. When you create new goals, they have to be exciting for you so you’ll be inspired to take action. Don’t be afraid to think big in your self-development journey! 

Example of Big Goals:

I’m a VISIONARY and world-class problem solver with my company XYZ so we can improve the lives of millions of customers

I’m a meditator & practice Transcendental Meditation twice a day

I have a lean, strong body, weigh 180 pounds, and train in jiu-jitsu 3 times per week

I’m the best Dad I can be

I’m a professional speaker and in-demand life coach

I earn $X per month, give 10% of my income to those in need, and have a net worth of $X

The core values of my company are to be joyful, productive, and fulfilled and I embody them every day

I enjoy abundance in all of the roles I play

I believe more every day!

Everything on this list is thinking bigger than I am - they’re all lies - that’s the point. Your goals or vision must point you towards a better place. 

What are your top, thinking-big goals? Tell me in the comments!

Get to Know Yourself

I enjoy the “Dinner with Cupid” column in the Boston Globe. The first thing I do is compare the grades that each participant gives the other. And I’m always curious how they arrived at the grades. The articles are formulaic: I was nervous, the other person was late or early, we ordered this food, learned a few things about the other person, and the wrap-up. The conversation seems typical first date material - a surface level search of things in common and a back and forth of each other’s interests. 

What they need is a way to communicate the core importance of each person quickly. I think each person should go through a self-development profile before the date. As a result, you could hand over a document filled with the most important parts of each person: mission/purpose, goals, and a list of the roles you play (and not a general overview) - I mean a list of roles that include future roles the person is moving towards intentionally. You’d be able to say: “This is what I’m all about.”

Here’s my list of roles:

1. TM Meditator

2. Innovator & Visionary 

3. Lean, Strong Body & Clean Eater

4. The Dude…a Sage

5. Financial Wiz

6. Giver and Philanthropist

7 .Husband

8. Dad

9. Family / Friend

10. Happy Hobbyist

11. Movie Buff

12. Chef & Mixologist

13. Joker

14. Writer & Journaler

15. Willy Wonka of Creativity

16. ATH Founder & World-Class Problem Solver

17. Productivity Coach
18. Support Group Facilitator

19. Professional Speaker

20. Podcaster

21. Sales Pro

22. Marketing Guru & Social Media Participant

23.  Musician & Music Therapist 

And a sample of a mini-mission statement for one of the roles: 

1-Meditator

I’m a meditator. Transcendental Meditation brings beautiful depth to my life. When I’m in deep silence, I catch the big fish ideas and experience bliss over and over again. As a result, I give much more of my soul and my talents to a world that needs it desperately. TM is my magic reset button.

Here are resources to help you get to know who you really are so you can share it with the VIPs in your life!

https://allthehatswewear.com/blog/ep-95-the-most-powerful-time-management-skill-youre-not-using

https://allthehatswewear.com/blog/a-mission-statement-youll-actually-use-everyday?rq=mission